neelwrites/fiction/shortstory/175ds/FFfAW/31/01/2017

Not so funny games (171 words)

By Neel Anil Panicker

Little Ricky smelled an opportunity.

He watched his mom as she stepped out clutching her shopping bag,  waited for her to turn around at the gate, and utter her standard warning, “Weather’s very bad. Stay inside, okey”.

He nodded his head; knew she would not be home for an hour.

That’s how it had been for the past two weeks ever since Dad had to ‘urgently leave town for office work’.

He waited for the sound of her footsteps as it hit the asphalt road leading out to the main road to recede and fade away; then tiptoed out.

In no time he had sprinted past the apartment blocks, jumping over the fence to reach the edges of the swampy grounds.

He was looking for frogs. ‘We catch them there,’ his friends boasted.

Ricky bent down near a puddle of dirty water and dipped his hand.

He felt something and yanked his hand out.

His little fingers held a Titan watch, its glass smashed.

It was his father’s. He ran out screaming.

(c)neelanilpanicker2017#fiction#shortstory#FFfAW#171words

WELCOME !

100th Challenge

Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers

Week of 01-31 through 02-06-2017

FFfAW Challenge-Week of January 31, 2017

Written for FLASH FICTION FOR ASPIRING WRITERS CHALLENGE HOSTED BY PRICELESS JOY AT

https://flashfictionforaspiringwriters.wordpress.com/2017/01/30/fffaw-challenge-week-of-january-31-2017/

Advertisements

20 thoughts on “neelwrites/fiction/shortstory/175ds/FFfAW/31/01/2017

  1. Goodness Neel that was an unexpected ending, well done you drew me into your story very well…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Michael, that was very nice of you to say. I am glad you were drawn into the story. Thanks again.

      Liked by 1 person

    2. Thanks Michael, that’s what i am hearing a lot about this story. I am glad you thought so. Thanks again.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. An interesting take. Hope you follow it up.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Yarnspinner. I do indeed intend to do that.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. hahahaha well, his mum will not be happy about that,

    Like

    1. Yes indeed, becoz she’s got a lot to answer for. Thanks Joyfrida for your appreciation.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Thanks a lot Yarnspinner. I do intend to follow this up. Have a wonderful day.

    Like

  5. Great twist at the end, completely unexpected. What a discovery – did the mother have something to do with it I wonder? Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Kelly, your guess is as good as mine. I am glad you liked my story.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Oh no! His dad has been killed! Such a sad ending Neel! Wonderful story!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, sad indeed. I am so glad you liked my story, PJ.

      Like

      1. I really liked your story! 🙂

        Like

  7. michael1148humphris

    Such a shock, I did not expect that, well done,

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Terribly shocking. I am glad you liked my story, Michael.

      Like

  8. That took a horrible twist at the end.

    Like

    1. Yes, it was horrible. Alas! the perils of good fiction. But then fiction is nothing but a reflection of life’s harsh truths. Thanks James.

      Like

  9. Nooooo, you can’t finish on a cliffhanger!! lol

    Like

    1. Yes, I can, lol. Thanks for your appreciation.

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: